Looking Ahead at WWE Money In The Bank

So, the latest WWE PPV is around the corner in “Money in the Bank.”  It’s another one of the themed PPVs by the WWE that is centered around what is usually the biggest drawn match at Wrestlemania.  Whoever has won that match has ended up winning the world title. Names such as Rob Van Dam, Kane, CM Punk, Edge, The Miz and even Jack Swagger have won these matches and have ended up winning a world title.

 

 

 

So with this PPV, they have two different MITB matches, one for each brand and whoever wins goes for their brand’s world title.  In looking at who is in these matches, rather than list reasons why they should win or talk about why they have a chance at winning, I figure it’s easier to just break it down to who I think is gonna win and who doesn’t have a shot in hell at winning MITB.

 

 

 

First, we have the Smackdown side: (Because I figured this was the easier one)

 

In the match, there is Sheamus, Sin Cara, Wade Barrett, Daniel Bryan, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Kane, and Cody Rhodes.

 

 

 

Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater: I figured I’d put them in one section since my answer both of them is “No Fucking Way!!!”  These guys are not and I repeat NOT going to win.  Why? Why either of these two get a world title shot? What for? We’ve only seen them in tag matches and in rare times where we’ve seen them wrestle in singles, it was to get their asses kicked. Besides, lately all we seen these guys do is fight the Uso Brothers.  So, chalk off these guys because they’re not getting a world title shot.

 

 

 

Sin Cara: Let me first say that I like the guy and while his style need adjustment and he does make mistakes and I don’t get the lighting in the ring, I think he has potential.  That being said, he’s also not gonna win this because he’s still in the adjustment phase AND he’s only been in action for a few months. He’s not ready for a title run so just go ahead and chalk him off as well.

 

 

 

Kane: Yes I know. He won last year and won the world title at the PPV when he cashed his in on the same night. I’m aware of this but the only problem is that while we have seen a multi-time winner of Money in the Bank, I don’t see that in Kane. CM Punk is a two-time winner but when he won, it was to help elevate the guy. Kane as much as I like him, he’s just simply…..there.  Not really involved in any certain storyline since the draft and briefly involved in altercations with Mark Henry and Alberto Del Rio. Beyond that, what reason would there be for Kane to win?

 

 

 

Cody Rhodes: Again, I like his character in terms of him feeling like his face is trashed and it’s made him insane.  I like his delivery of his character, but yet at the same time, I can’t take it seriously with the whole paper bag thing.  It just takes what is a character that works, and adding something campy, cheesy and just plain stupid. If it weren’t for that, I’d say he has a chance. A part of me still thinks he does, but it’s more of a longshot considering what was mentioned above and last I checked he seemed to be eyeing the Intercontinental Title held by Big Zeke himself Ezekiel Jackson.

 

 

 

Daniel Bryan: You won’t find a bigger mark for Daniel Bryan/Bryan Danielson than me. I loved him in Ring of Honor and I’m big on “The American Dragon” as he will always be that to me, no matter what the WWE does with him.  I’ve yet to see the guy have a bad match whether in WWE or ROH.  Even if the other guy stinks, he knows how to deliver on his end.  My only complaint is that as good as he is, WWE is not fully utilizing his full potential and are barely scratching the surface of it.  He hasn’t held a title since losing the United States Championship to Sheamus, which by the way I feel he got screwed out of his first PPV match at Mania this year.  He will also be in my longshot pick because I feel that maybe going after a title again is just what he needs.

 

 

 

Sheamus: Yes I’m aware he’s a two-time champion, though I never really took him seriously as one.  To me, he’s always been just a paler, bigger version of Final but with a Ronald McDonald haircut.  I thought he got the belt too soon the first time and never behind his second title reign and his finisher while it looks cool sometimes, it’s just a bicycle kick. But he’s also in my pick at potential to win, simply because he’s held the belt before.

 

 

 

Wade Barrett: He had something going with the Nexus and if they wanted to continue that storyline, I think the Nexus should have won more gold including Barrett beating Orton and winning the belt.  Than they made The Corre and that went nowhere so now Barrett is on his own and he lost the Intercontinental Title to Big Zeke.  There are a lot of guys who think Barrett is a future world champion, but I just don’t see it.  His skills in the ring don’t impress me and I think his finisher sucks. It’s just a fireman’s carry slam/standing reverse Samoan Drop. What’s the big deal about it?

 

 

 

So overall, my picks on who I think has the better chance to win, basing it on who I think can benefit the most and who needs the elevation as well as maintain the MITB winners to be random:  Daniel Bryan, Sheamus, Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett. So yes, I’m picking Daniel Bryan as my top pick to win.

 

 

 

Now onto the Raw side and on that, we have: Rey Mysterio, Evan Bourne, Alberto Del Rio, R-Truth, Jack Swagger, The Miz, Alex Riley, and Kofi Kingston.  I’ll start with one of the guys who is probably the most obvious to a lot of people.

 

 

 

Alberto Del Rio: Any other time, I’d pick him to win also, but there’s just one problem.  Why would he win if he just won the “No. 1 Contender” spot and is already next in line? Seems kind of redundant to me.  Personally I think he was pushed too fast, shouldn’t have won Royal Rumble. He was getting a JBL push and that is the worst thing that could happen. I don’t like his finisher and while I see something in him, it’s not enough to make me buy that he’s world champion worthy….yet.

 

 

 

The Miz: He has the potential to be a two-time winner.  He won last year and it ended up being one of the best things to happen for his career.  It moved him up amongst the elite in the roster.  The only problem is that he’s been on a losing streak, been in a rivalry (And losing) to Alex Riley.  The Miz is another name who seems to have gotten lost in the mix., but this could be the thing to help bring him back up.

 

 

 

Jack Swagger: Despite what Michael “Makes Mark Madden look like Jim Ross” Cole said a couple months ago, I actually DO remember Jack Swagger as a world champion. I remember it, but it doesn’t mean I wanted to remember. His title reign was forgettable and only lasted a couple months.  Nobody could understand why he won the belt instead of letting Edge win it from Jericho at Mania.  I still don’t’ get  it myself.  He’s gone from the Gutwrench Powerbomb to the Ankle Lock.  I got three words for that to describe Jack Swagger: NOT KURT ANGLE!!!  Despite what a lot of people say that Swagger is a good wrestler, I just don’t see it.  He doesn’t deliver well on the microphone, the push-ups thing has been done to death, his ankle lock looks sloppy and currently he’s in a back and forth battle with Evan Bourne.  If there is a two-time money in the bank winner, it won’t be Swagger regardless of how much creative has buried him.

 

 

 

R-Truth: I’ve already said it on here before so I’ll make it short and sweet with Truth.  I don’t like his heel character. I think is character is racist in the aspect of how creative is implying that the only way for a black man to get over as a heel is to be not only ghetto and crazy, but also stupid and ignorant on a massive scale. I don’t like that and I don’t like the whole obsession with “Little Jimmy.” It’s not even funny, it’s just plain sad, cruel and kinda tragic. Top that off with the fact that it makes his character so stupid and laughable that it prevents the crowd from taking him seriously as a heel or buying him as a top contender for the world title. Oh and one more thing, Why the hell does he STILL not have an actual entrance music? All we get is “The Truth Shall Set You Free” and then nothing, he just walks to the ring.  Not impressed in the least. So while this would be a move that could help his character, not only am I not picking him to win, but I’m also not really sure I want him to either.

 

 

 

Evan Bourne: I’m a big fan of Evan Bourne. I loved him since his days as Matt Sydal and I love what he brings to the ring. He’s the next level of a high flyer in the WWE and I feel that the WWE hasn’t done near enough that they should with him.  He’s been there for a few years now and has yet to win any kind of title belt, top that off with he’s one of the top reasons why there should be a revival of the cruiserweight division.  He’s even been able to deliver in matches featured with the elite main eventers so there’s reason to buy that he can’t do the same if given a belt.

 

 

 

Kofi Kingston: Another one I’m a fan of. I like his style and I like what he brings to the ring and to be honest, I’ve yet to see a bad match with him either.  I don’t like that they’re resorting to re-hashing an old feud between Kofi Kingston and Dolph Ziggler.  I think that he’s too good to be in the mid-card and he needs to take it up to the next level. I also liked when Kofi was going against Randy Orton because I thought there was something there and then the WWE pulled the plug. He’s got the skills in the ring, he’s quick, decent on the microphone, has the energy and the crowd seems to like him. Why not give him a shot and see what he can do? I think it’s long overdue and it’d add something fresh and new for the WWE, something that they don’t seem to know how to do anymore.

 

 

 

Rey Mysterio: Not taking anything from Rey Mysterio or what he does in the ring. The only problem is that we’ve seen it all before and don’t really get anything new from the guy these days. He’s back and forth with Alberto Del Rio, despite that we’ve seen it before. He still draws a good reaction from the crowd and yes he’s held the world title before, multiple times even.  But the problem is who can we see Rey feud with as champion that we haven’t already seen before?

 

 

 

Alex Riley: Right now, this guy is the hottest up and comer. We’re seeing something from him that we didn’t know he had in either NXT or when he was the Miz’s lapdog.  When he turned against the Miz, we saw a different Alex Riley emerge. There was a spark there, a fire even and the crowd was loving it. It felt real and you could just see the energy. Not to mention that lately, since that  and beating the Miz twice, he’s become a hot commodity or at the very least, one of the WWE’s highest up and coming stars.  I think there is something there in Alex Riley and I’m not rulling out the possibility, due to experience in handling a briefcase before, that he can win this match.

 

 

 

So my picks as it stands for the Raw side: (It’s a tie at the top between these two) Alex Riley and The Miz, Kofi Kingston, Evan Bourne

 

Overall, the PPV seems decent enough on paper, but I’ve been wrong before.  I’d love for the WWE to prove me wrong, but I gotta see them actually make the thing meaningful.

 

Advertisements

To All Guys that Act Like the Divas/Knockouts are Hookers: STFU!!!

I’m not gonna lie, I’ve had more than a few moments where I shed some criticism of the Divas & Knockouts or at least of the ones that I thought were lacking in terms of “In-Ring” skills.  But by no means was I taking my criticism anywhere past that, but then you have some dickheads, wrestlers or obnoxious alleged “journalists” that make references towards the Divas & Knockouts looking at them like they’re prostitutes or spend more time drooling and fantasizing about the girls than actually reporting anything relevant.  One of the biggest ones that I have to mention is a guy I actually stuck up for at one point when he won the belt over Christian, but now wish somebody would just bitchslap the hell out of him. And of course I’m talking about Randy Orton.

Apparently, Randy Orton made some crude references about one Kelly Kelly and about how many guys she’s dated in the locker room and even making a reference to it being around 10 or more guys.  You know, nobody in the back has been safe ever since the whole Edge/Matt Hardy/Lita incident.  It pretty much destroyed whatever legacy Lita had and damn near erasing her accomplishments in the Divas division.  I will say the same thing about whoever or however many guys Kelly Kelly has dated that I said about that same incident mentioned above: “OH……MY……GOD!!!! WHO…..THE FUCK….CARES???!!!!!!!”

Seriously, she dates one guy or dates another in the back, why do I give a shit? Why should any of us give a shit? Whoever is dating who in the locker room whether it be TNA or WWE or ROH, should be irrelevant to the rest of us.  It holds about the same equivalent as a gossip rag or TMZ or to a degree, the Fox News Channel. I don’t care what wrestler Kelly Kelly is dating. I don’t care about Michelle McCool marrying the Undertaker.  I don’t care about John Morrison and Melina dating.  Only thing I care about is what happens in the ring. It’s what a lot of us that do this write about and not what these guys or girls do in their personal life. As for what Randy Orton said: Randy you’re a good wrestler and I like the whole “Viper” persona but in terms of this and what you said about Kelly Kelly, all I can say is SHUT YOUR FAT FUCKING PIEHOLE!!!!! Oh and speaking of fat fucking pieholes, it’s the Super Fatass Mark “still blames DDP for losing his job” Madden.

Say what you want about the WWE, at least they didn’t hire this jackass. It’d be like Vince McMahon giving Eric Bischoff control of the creative department in WWE.   So in his latest edition of what he calls reality but is really just a couple of bile that is similar to what you’ll find in wrestling forums, not only does he go on about how all the divas/knockouts are good for is action on the road since they don’t generate enough crowd reaction with their matches, but also goes on drooling over Brooke Adams/Miss Tessmacher and what he’d do to her or would want done from her. Keep your fantasies to yourself, fatass. Nobody wants to hear it and I sure as hell don’t want to hear it.  I didn’t want to hear your drooling fantasies about Mickie James or Angelina Love or Brooke Adams or Lacey Von Erich.  You could have every single musclebound wrestler in the locker room or any pop singing teeny bopper as a wingman and the only piece of those girls you’ll get is either a slap across your fat head or a swift kick in the balls. Then again, he’d have to have Eric “Has a raging Hard-On for 10 Perecenters” Bischoff sew them back on first since we all know Madden had them clipped off when he got his job on WCW Thunder. Oh, and stop blaming DDP for losing your job when the truth was you sucked so bad on a microphone, you made Mike Adamle on ECW sound like Gordon Solie.

Maybe the Divas/Knockouts don’t draw as much as the guys. Maybe can’t do a lot of what the guys do in the ring. Bottom line is that they’re doing this because maybe just maybe a few of them actually love pro wrestling and want to be a part of it.  I give my share of criticism on some of the women wrestlers, I admit that, but unlike some people, I still view them as wrestlers and not on-screen prostitutes that jagoffs like Mark Madden view them as. So to all those that think that way and think that their personal life and what they do is important, Shut the Hell Up and just watch the wrestlers, both male and female, and just do us all a favor and keep your fucking traps shut for the rest of us that want to watch the wrestlers in the ring regardless of their gender.