WWE Raw: Nightmare Come True and It Comes with a Raspy Voice

Tonight wasn’t so bad when Raw started. I was actually enjoying the segment with Triple H, John Cena, Sheamus and CM Punk.  Even having CM Punk at the announce table was a treat.  And then…… It happened.  Vince McMahon in all his glory returns and pretty much fires Triple H from the COO position and makes Not So Super Dave Osborne, better known as John Laurinaitis, better known as Johnny Ace or The Dynamic Dickhead, is now made the “interim” General Manager of Raw.  Pardon me while I vomit at remembering this disaster because it’s like waking up from a dream and into a nightmare.

But wait, the 2 hours of hell continued on.  John Morrison gets beat by Christian in under 3 minutes.  My advice to John Morrison is to get the hell out of Dodge while you still can.  I guess Morrison doesn’t fit what the mold for what WWE considers to be an actual pro wrestler.  The translation for that:  They can’t stand a guy that actually looks good to great in the ring.  Top it off with the Vinny Mac flunky that is Johnny Ace himself firing Jim Ross.  So once again we’re back with a shitty announcer team of Jerry Lawler with Monkey’s Asshole himself Michael Cole.  Top that off with having two “big matches” that they advertised and both had something happen in it.  Mark Henry vs Randy Orton had Cody Rhodes interview, boy what a step down that is for Orton to now be feuding with Rhodes.  Then you have what is supposed to be Alberto Del Rio vs CM Punk only to have it turned into a tag match between those two against Miz and R-Truth.  But WAIT!!!!! There’s one more change to that match!!!!!! Del Rio wimps out and fakes an injury leaving Punk on his own and making it a handicap match.  So in a way, your main event got changed TWICE!!!!!

Congratulations is in order for the WWE.  Not only have you demonstrated that as stupid as TNA is in the moves they’ve made as of late, you still know how to demonstrate equal to greater stupidity and you raise it to an art form.  You got a guy that nobody liked OR wanted as an authority figure and how funny is it that the Monkey Cole goes on about how the narcissism is gone from Raw. Not quite Monkey Boy, we’re still having to suffer your sorry ass to the fact that Vince McMahon and the rest of WWE Management is too stupid to realize you can’t announce for shit and that when push comes to shove, you’re nothing more than a useless jackass with a headset on.

Going back to Jim Ross and his “firing,” I can’t help but wonder what was the point?  What was the point in bringing him back to the announcer’s table? What was the point of anything with him if you were just going to pull this crap that we haven’t seen 10 million times before?  I was one of those that was not wanting Vince to return and I damn sure didn’t want John Laryngitis as an on-screen character. Look what happened now, we ended up with both in all of its predictable glory.  Thank you so much, WWE.  You’ve officially turned Monday Night Raw into Monday Nitro because now it’s just as predictable and stupid as Nitro ended up being.  Why not complete the circle and make Smackdown into WCW Thunder or really make it look bad and call it WCW World Wide. If any of your crap that you call Raw or Smackdown were any worse, you might as well call it NXT.

Wake me up when this nightmare finally ends.



  1. Seems in the WWE if you start getting over more then Cena they start making you look bad..Swagger and Ziggler are good(nobody looks like they really been in a fight like Ziggler) that makes cena look bad, so Zigglet and Swagger are now losing to Zack Rider WTF?

  2. Also Cole really does suck as announcer I remember when they used to call the moves now announcers are just a comedy team.. I remember telling my girl i really wanted to see how they eould do Raw the next week after everybody left I jokinkly said every match would have Cena and punk fighting and in the main event they’d be too exhausted or they’d some how have a Cena vs Cena main eventI wish either of those had happened instead of what did happen.

    • Thank you. You have no idea how relieved I feel whenever somebody sees that Cole is a crappy announcer.

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